Sure the original thread is on the "Other Hobbies and Interests" section but nobody seems to be looking there, so I've started it off again here. Make sense to me......
1. Anyone fancy a chunk of my homemade GRAPE and gooseberry tart?
FEARS of a grape growers stampede have persuaded me not to add pears to my tart in any shape or form
I have HEARD rumours of violence among the Chardonnay community.
Stale BREAD dipped in rancid Chardonnay is not a particularly effective weapon
A fearsome BROOD of local Vikings could help with weapons if need be.
Best wear a peg on your nose as the ODOUR from many sweaty Viking long johns can be overpowering
The SOUND of rusty Nordic bagpipes and neutered cats from within the Viking dwelling may be a tad off-putting
True, but they would have to be a long way off to avoid hearing the screech of ear-splitting Viking bagpipe TUNES
UNITY in all things, that's what I say.
Has anyone tried TYING a Viking maiden to a bed post recently?
SomeTHINK that genuine Viking maidens are hard to find these days.